English Legacy: Fireplace (Chapter 20)

Crazy crazy world crazy crazy times
Crazy crazy world crazy crazy times
Hang up your chairs to better sweep
Clear the floor to dance
Shake the rug into the fireplace

Nine, ten, * grumble mumble snort * excitable brothers... eleven...

Something bothering you, Alexander?

And * grunt * twelve... you mean, besides you right now?

Hey, what'd I do? I haven't been around for a while. I figured I'd give you guys some space since the funeral.

I doubt that very much... I have my suspicions you haven't been very far away at all...

Suspect all you want, genius. Anyway, why were you mumbling about your brother? You guys have always gotten along pretty well. Something bad happen?

Well, no, not really.... he's just been Christopher, his usual Easily Excited self. It just showed up in a big way at mine and Shante's wedding.

Whoa, time out. You and Shante got married? I thought she was going to get a job first?
Oh, she did. She ran right down to the Police Station to sign up to be a Snitch. She wants to be a Dynamic DNA Profiler just like my dad. We'd had our wedding scheduled for Friday after everyone got home from work.

Everyone? Christopher and Latricia have jobs, too? She's living there now, too?
Yes. She moved in right after their joint birthday party. What I want to know, is where that convenient extra birthday cake came from at Chris' party. Now, they're the same age. He didn't even know it was her birthday. Neither did she, oddly.

It is a mystery.

Shyeah, right. Anyway, Latricia got a job in the Medical field. She seemed to be throwing herself into it... she even asked me to help her build up her athletic skill so she has more stamina for those long shifts in the future.
Fascinating. Anyway, back to the wedding! What happened?

Well, Shante and I decided to throw a Wedding Party - Mom's a Legendary Hostess, so she loves doing it. Shante doesn't like crowds, but she thought this would be fun.
Another thing I couldn't figure out, is why Latricia and Shante are wearing the same dresses. This was supposed to be mine and Shante's wedding.

Another mystery, truly.
So, Shante and I said our vows before our family and friends - for richer, for poorer, in conspiracy and in tranquility, solving the Unsolvable, until death do we part, without leaving the faucet running, etc. It was a very nice wedding for the two of us.

Mom told me Chris was really, really excited for the two of us, but until immediately after I kissed my Neurotic, Genius bride, Chris turns to Latricia, and gets down on one knee.
He then pulls a ring box out of nowhere and Proposes to her, right then and there! She was taken totally by surprise, but still said yes. I'll give him that, my brother knows how to take advantage of a situation.

Oh please, don't be like that. Your brother doesn't have a negative trait in his body. He's just very.. spontaneous.

Explain this, then! If it was a spur-of-the-moment thing.... then answer me this....
... Where did he get the wedding rings from five minutes later if it was so "spontaneous"?

Hmm.... a third mystery for us to ponder.

Uh-huh. I shouldn't complain; the two of them seemed as happy as Shante and I, and they do make a good couple. Chris has even joined the Military, cause he wants to be an Astronaut, just like me. The best part, is that he has to Salute me, since I outrank him.

What happened after that?

What do you THINK happens, Mr. Creator-person? Shante and I went to my room...
... and then we....
All right, all right. I get the picture. I see you still haven't changed the style of those sheets. Think of people's retinas, man!

You think mine are loud? Chris has been using the same style of sheets since he was a little kid.
I kinda like those - they match his walls... uh, are they... WooHooing at the same time you and Shante are?

If they were, then that explains the whole house shaking, as Mom put it.

Speaking of your mother, how's she doing?

She's been fine. She's been busy with work, and painting, and her garden. She seems really content lately.

I imagine she must be missing your father terribly.

Well no, not really. It's hard to miss him when he keeps showing up every night!

Creator's Note: And now for something completely different.

* SHAMELESS TEASER IMAGE *