English Legacy: I Took Your Name (Chapter 6)

* click * be deleted! Please! We don't want to.... bwuh? Wait... we're still here?

"Laurel?"

"Yeah?"

"Uh... we um, still exist. Do you uh, feel any different?"

"Different how? What's up with you? For a moment there you looked like you were going to swap your Bladder and Hygiene bars. And not in a good way. Is something wrong?"

"Um, no... I think... I think things are fine, actually. Say Laurel, I just had a crazy idea!"

"Like, meeting my parents, who are in the next room, now that we're engaged?"
"Crazier than that. Come on, let's go back to my place. I'm not sure how much time we have."

"Okay, sweetheart... but you'd better have an explanation for all this."
* on the drive back to Brian's house *

"Wow, a Legacy challenge? Well, that certainly explains a lot. Do you talk to Him often?"

"Not every day. But then again, I'm not sure how many of my Actions are the result of His intervention, or my own Free Will. I'm not sure I would have Worked Hard each and every single day at work. You haven't spoken to Him?"

"No. I've heard rumors about people who have... they're usually been in a mental hospital, or surrounded by toddlers, or some other strange set of circumstances. Or worse, being forced to basically live outdoors growing their own food or something weird. Some people say their Creators are female."

"Well, here we are, my love. I hate to rush this, but until I find out why we still exist, I think we we should try to earn our keep, so to speak."

"That's fine, Brian. I wouldn't have had this any other way. You and I and our future descendants, that's what matters."
"...and with this ring, I thee wed. Now, kiss the bride."
* sluuuuurrrrrrrrp * * giggles * * murmurs *

"I love you, Laurel, with all my heart and soul."

"And I love you, Brian. More than I could have possibly imagined. Now, I really think we should get started on that whole 'heir-raising scheme'."

"Wait, right now? We've barely gotten you moved in?"

"Yes, now. Don't make me tell you again, Mister English. Let me show you what my sleepwear looks like." *spins*

[Image: leopardskinthong.jpg not found. Please contact your system administrator, because; daymn, she's fine.]

"Oh wow.... just.... man, I almost hope we don't hear the chimes this time..."
* doo dee dee daaaaa *

"That was incredible, Laurel. I think you've shown me a new art form. Or at least a heavenly body. Think we can do that again?"

"Easy, killer. We need to rest - tomorrow's a busy day. We have to do some work on the house with the money I've added to this household."

"I wore the clothes you wanted
I took your name
If there is some confusion, who's to blame?"

English Legacy: Bittersweet Me (Chapter 5)

"You move across, innocence lost,
all static and desire,
you're blue in the face from navel gaze,
you set yourself on fire."

Ha! I bet you didn't think I could do it!

You're right, I didn't think you could do it. But, for next time, I think a sponge would work better than the macaroni salad.

Wait, what? No, I'm not talking about that... I mean, I bet you thought I'd never find another romantic prospect besides Shirley Lin!
Who is she? She looks kinda like...

Yeah, I noticed that, too. Her name is Laurel Grisby. I met her near the diner the other night. She seemed a bit Flirty when I was first speaking to her, but, she's got a great Sense of Humor. We hit it off very well.
Well, that's good. What else have you learned?

She was telling me about some of the Art she is fond of. Maybe she can help me with my painting skill so I can get promoted past Sketch Artist. She also told me she's very Handy with a wrench... which will be useful the next time that cheap toilet breaks down.

You lead such a hard life. What does she do for a living?

She doesn't have a job, she told me. I asked her what career she might be interested in, but she didn't seem concerned too much.

Wait. No job? Where does she live?

Um, I didn't really ask. I thought part of the rules were she had to move in with me, not me with her. Things only got better from then on, though, I know you'll be happy with this!
I managed to get her to come over a few times. I confessed my attraction to her, and it turns out she feels the same way towards me! It didn't take long before she found me Irresistable!

Oh.... so you managed to get her to WooHoo with you? What happened to waiting for marriage?
We've got that covered too. We didn't Try for a Baby, but I asked her to marry me, and she said Yes! We're engaged now! We're debating where to have a Private Wedding, or a big Wedding Party. She knows I'm still working on building a bank account, so she told me not to worry if we do have a fancy wedding - her parents will pay for it!

Uh... her parents will pay for it? Did you even learn where she lives yet?

Oh, yeah, the next day, I decided to pay her a visit, so I could meet her parents. Turns out the address she gave me was literally across the street from this big lot I have! Take a look at just the bottom floor of her house!
Talk about a great house! A pool, nice furniture....

Stop! Stop right there. Does she live here, with her parents?

Uh... yeah. I guess that's why she doesn't seem to need a job - turns out her parents are loaded!

Oh no, that means....

Means what? Why are you acting so strange, anyway?

Because, even though you're a Crime Scene Technician, you're one of the most OBLIVIOUS Sims I've ever had the dubious honor of monitoring! If her parents are rich, and she lives with them... THAT MAKES HER A RICH SIM!

Uh... well, yeah. She's rich, so what? She likes what I've done with the house so far, and hopes we can build it up for our future descendants...

Dude, didn't you real ALL the Legacy rules? You're the Founder..... you're not permitted to marry a rich Sim!

Wait, I can't? I can't marry her? But we're in love... we're ENGAGED.

Okay, okay... we might be able to salvage this. Tell me you haven't hit the Save button yet.
.......

.......

Uh......

I SAID, Tell Me you haven't hit the Save button yet!!

Uh, well, you see, I wanted to make sure that nothing could interfere with us getting married, so I kinda hit the Save option after she said Yes to marrying me.... I mean, it's taken long enough as it is.... your "Less than a week" you mentioned last update turned out to be TWO DAYS. I've only got 19 days left until I become an Elder, and I'm not even married yet.

...........

Say something. Tell me what happens next.

Sigh... there's not enough time. This is all my fault.... I should have guided you to finding a mate first off, rather that build up your house. I don't think we can continue with the Legacy Challenge.

Wait. What are you saying? Are you going to... *gulp* delete me? I've worked so hard... I've found a woman who wants to spend the rest of her life with me.... look how happy she is!
I know, I know. I'm really sorry to have to do this to you both, but... currently, the two of you no longer suit My purposes. I will not be able to continue the Challenge with you. The failure is more my own, than yours. You have done everything I asked, and now.. I must do what I must do.

Wait! Please! Don't do it! We don't deserve to * click *

English Legacy: Moral Kiosk (Chapter 4)

"Scratch the scandals in the twilight
Trying to shock but instead
Idle hands all orient to her
Pass a magic pillow under head
It's so much more attractive inside the moral kiosk"

Hello again, readers. I'm a bit surprised, that it's been another productive week for our hero. I'm glad to report that Brian has actually managed to get himself promoted all the way to Crime Scene Technician. After his promotion to Wiretap Reader, I was able to build him a few walls for his meager abode, with his cash bonus.
I said, a "Few more" walls, not all of them... you people expect too much, sometimes.

However, this must have been just enough to motivate Brian even further. On his next day of work, he Worked Hard the whole day, and actually managed to get promoted to his current position after that one day! Which, of course, brought another cash bonus, and therefore, more work done on the house.
Walls! Lights! Windows! Carpet! It's got it all... except for someone to SHARE IT WITH HIM. Someone to HELP HIM CREATE A SECOND GENERATION for this Legacy!

Hey, give it a rest, okay? I'm doing the best I can. It's not my fault there's a seeming lack of available women here in Riverview. You aren't exactly helping by trying to burn me out making me Work Hard every darned day. Past few days, I haven't had the Energy to socialize much.

Well, we're going to work on it right now. Remember Diana, that blonde teenager you were chatting with, the last time the school gave you the Opportunity to put the fear of Me into them?

Yeah. She seemed nice. Too bad she's a teenager. She seemed to want a family, even though she seemed a bit of a loner, like me.

No, she's not a teenager anymore. Apparently she aged up overnight. She's now a Young Adult, same as you. Heck, she even called you to chat the other day. Call her and invite her over for dinner.
Okay, that I can do. * calls * Oh, cool, she's coming over. Let me just whip up some Summer Salad for us to eat - don't want to risk burning this place down, since it seems to be missing a smoke alarm. Hint hint.

Oh spare me, Captain Whitebread. You're lucky to have walls, AND carpet in this house so far.

"Lucky" my reticulated spline. You only spent my money on the cheapest carpet and wall paper available to get rid of my Unfinished Room moodlet. I'm just lucky I still had money left, when you realized you'd forgotten to install a bathroom door.

Why, you ungrateful little....

* Ding dong *

She's here! Now, keep quiet while we have dinner, all right?

Whoa, look who thinks he can boss around his Creator just because he's got a roof over his head! All right, but don't you ruin this, you...

Diana! Hi! Come on in! Dinner will be ready in just a moment! I hope you like salad...

* three hours later *
Well? How did it go? I note, with some dismay, that she's gone home.

Yeah, well, I've got good news, and I've got bad news. Which do you want first?

Uh... the good news.
Well, I think she's got definite potential. For example, she washed the dishes after eating without needing to be told!

* headdesk * Oh bloody heck. You do realize ALL the commenters so far have been women, right? No inventing a Male Sexist Pig trait, okay? so... what's the bad news?
The bad news is, some guy named Oscar seems to have noticed her potential as well. She's in a Relationship with him. She's kinda off the market... it got a bit awkward when I tried to Flirt with her anyway...

* facepalm * Oh, for Me's sake. I'm pretty sure the Legacy rules don't allow Me to snuff rival suitors for your chosen mate.

Where does it say you CAN'T?

Aren't you a little too Good for such a suggestion to come out of your mouth?

It was just a thought. The night wasn't a total loss.... she let me Question her for a Report, so I can hopefully get another promotion in the future.
Life be your wild mistress. Okay, CSI English, enough of this screwing around. Or rather, the lack of it. You've got until I get the warning that your birthday is coming up to find a mate. If you don't, you're going to do and say whatever it takes for Shirley Lin to Move In, Marry You, and start working on a potential heir.

...And you called * me * a male sexist pig? Boy, I hope I can find the woman of my dreams. Shirley is pretty enough, but when I went to visit her, she seemed like a bit of a Coward. and that high-pitched voice of hers... It's almost unbearable at times.
I don't care if she's got a voice like James Earl Jones with smoker's cough. You've got less than a week, I suggest you make the most of it.

English Legacy: These Days (Chapter 3)

Greetings, readers. It's the Creator, here. When we last left our hero, he was on his way to his first day of work, with the mindset (thanks to me) of getting promoted as quickly as possible.

I'm glad to say that by the end of Friday, he had managed to get himself promoted to Traffic Cop, where among other things, you can apprehend burglars! He managed to use most of his money to slowly upgrade his possessions.
For example, now he has a bathtub to sit on while eating, instead of the throne. Progress!

As for his friend Shirley, our Founder spent most of his first Saturday trying to get to know her better. all he'd known at the start was that she was a Hopeless Romantic, like himself.
After meeting, he went with her to the diner, for some food and conversation. One thing I learned is that she had a really strange combo of traits so far - She has No Sense of Humor, and is Unflirty. Yes, I'll let that sink in. It seems that Shirley, she must be serious!

I suppose I might not be a barrel o' laughs if my job involved Bed Pans, like hers does.

Well, our hero, being the Good person he is, doesn't see her so much a marriage prospect anymore, but he still Wishes to be Good Friends with her while he keeps looking.

In other developments, young Brian finally saved up the dosh to buy his first computer, which he immediately put to use Hacking, to get some additional cash flow. Yes, my law-enforcement Founder is hacking himself money.

Irony; I wrap it around me like a warm blanket.
Of course, two nights after he bought the PC, things got... weird. When you reach Traffic Cop, the game goes out of it's way to tell you that you are trained to apprehend burglars!
Unless, of course, it's YOUR house, or lawn, they're robbing. If there's something specific you have to do to apprehend a Burglar, I'd love to know what it is. The burglar made off with Brian's brand new $45 desk lamp (which was on the same table as the $700 COMPUTER), his bottle of bubble bath, and his rubber ducky. The fiend!
Oh yeah, a ghost showed up at the same time. A ghost. I've no idea where it came from. I do know where he went - right to the computer to play games on it.
This, of course, made it so our hero could not pee while the ghost was there. Not to be thwarted, he thought maybe if he talked to the ghost, he could get him to leave!
"If you are going to kill a man anyway, it costs nothing to be polite." Especially if he's already dead, I guess. Our hero continued with his plan, to see if he could get a dialog option of "Goodbye" to use on the ghost.
No, he didn't get a Goodbye option... he had to wait until 6:00 AM, when the ghost went poof. He DID learn that this particular ghost was unemployed. There's a shocker. *rolleyes*

English Legacy: Carnival of Sorts (Chapter 2)

In a time beyond knowing, in a world beyond imagination, a great force of destruction grows, waiting for the opportunity to strike.

This is not that story, either.

When we last left our Founder, he was sitting on his bed, doing a whole lotta nothing. Contemplating his situation (and his bank balance); young Brian decided to actually get started on improving his life.
His first step in that direction was to go down to the local Police Department, and sign up to be a Snitch. With hard work and dedication, he hopes to be a force of good for the community of Riverview, and then, the world!

Actually, my goal right now pretty much consists of building a house, so the whole neighborhood doesn't have to watch while I'm using the toilet.

Hush, you. Here, I had you buy some books at the bookstore. Why don't you sit on that bench and read the Logic one? You'll need to up your logic skill to get promoted.
That seems to be a good idea. The sooner I get promoted, the sooner I can buy a computer.

A computer? What about things like a floor, a stove, your own shower, for starters?

And how much Fun could I have with those? When you point to a floor or a stove, do you see anything there that looks like fun when you click on it? I didn't exactly see a "Stare At Wall" action... I'm a Computer Whiz. Having Fun with computers is kinda what I do.

Okay, I see your point. Anyway, I see that's Hal Breckenridge sitting next to you. He's your new boss, when you start tomorrow. Why don't you say hello to him?

I don't have to yet. It's Logic I need. I don't see myself as the "Suck Up to Boss" type.

Whatever. Anyway, I'm not going to let you totally waste this excursion into town. I want you to start talking to women; see if you can find any that are single and possibly compatible. You're not getting any younger.

What? I have to find a woman myself? I'm not going to find one magically living next door, oddly receptive to all my advances?

Nope. This is a Legacy. You're going to have to do this the hard way. Hey look, over there by the front of the bookstore - she looks nice. Go talk to her, now that you've gotten that Wish to Learn the Logic skill fulfilled.
Hey, yeah, she seems nice. I think I'll try to Get to Know her.

* several minutes of conversation pass *

Well? How did it go? What have you learned?

For starters, her name is Shirley Lin. Her voice is a little high pitched, but she thought I was being friendly. Which I was. I even Brightened her day a bit.
That's it?

No, actually. She's actually single! And a Hopeless Romantic, just like me! I think she might be the one!

Easy, Romeo. She's the first woman, heck, the first Sim you've spoken to. We'll keep her at the top of the list for now, but we're gonna see who else is out there in Townie-land. I don't think you're quite ready to be "bringing honeys back to the crib" just yet.
Yeah, about that. Why can't You just "Create" me a house? I mean, I can't even wash my cereal bowl from this morning, that I ate from while sitting on that lovely commode behind me, without a sink! You could have at least put the john on the other side of the one wall I do have!

This is a Legacy Challenge. Emphasis on "Challenge". There's not going to be any Kachinging or Motherloding here. You want a better house, you're going to have to earn it.
You could have at least gotten me a shower. I actually had to go to the Gym to take one.

If I'd bought you a shower, I couldn't have afforded to buy you a bed. You want to sleep on the grass, go visit Alice and Kev.

All right, all right. Anyway, it's time for me to head off to work for my first day.
Um, do my eyes deceive me, or does the Police Station here have a listing of opening and closing times in the window?

Beats me. Looks like it, but I can't read Simlish.

That doesn't make any sense!

Neither did the fact that you were reading on your bed last night, and didn't seem to care that it was Dark. Anyway, that's all the time we have for this one. Please try to work yourself to the bone so you can get promoted quicker.

What happened to the benevolent, just, and fair Creator I've seen in your earlier entries?

That fair, benevolent Creator had more than eighty five bucks to work with. Now get to work!

English Legacy: Supernatural Superserious (Chapter 1)

Once upon a time, long ago, there was a young man, born into riches and comfort, who spent his days without a care in the world, and had everything handed to him on a silver platter. This is not his story. This is the story of a young (adult) Sim, Brian English, who, being alone in the world, decided to start a life for himself in the town of Riverview. Gathering all the money he could scrounge up, he bought himself a huge plot of land to build a house, a family, and a Legacy. Unfortunately for him, the idiot misread the price of the lot he was buying, and ended up spending $14,700 of the measly $16,000 Simoleons he had on him. Off to a great start....

Our "founder", for want of a better word, does have some Good points about him. He may be a bit of a Loner, but he has a Great Sense of Humor, and is a total Whiz with a Computer. Any woman he takes interest in, will quickly discover he is a Hopeless Romantic, as well.
Assuming this super genius can attract a mate, give the state of the "house" he's built for himself so far. If he had one Wish to accomplish in his Lifetime, it would be to become the best Forensic DNA Technician ever.

Oh, who am I? Well, you might call me his Creator. I won't have quite the latitude I'm used to, since I'm going to follow the Legacy Rules for Sims 3, but I will do what I can for him. Let's see how he likes his new digs....

Yay! I own a wall, and a toilet!

Nothing gets by you, does it? Did you notice the fridge, and the bed, too?
Wait just a minute; this is your idea of a bed? This thing only sleeps one! It looks about as comfortable as a french fry at a seagull convention!

What part of "low household funds" confuses you?
Oh well, at least I can relax on it, until I can afford a couch. And more walls.

And so.... our first update ends with our hero.... sitting on his cheap bed. I really hope you weren't hoping for cliffhangers in the Introduction.

EDIT: Oops... confused him with another Sim-Me... apparently our hero is a Hopeless Romantic, not a Couch Potato.